That’ll be $10.99, cash or card?
Our society teaches us that the survival of oneself is dependent solely on their own actions, and that real strength lies in suffering in silence. Major corporations fuel people’s feelings of loneliness to force them to find comfort in material gain, rather than social interaction. So much emphasis has been placed on hyper-independence, to commodify everything. When was the last time you picked a flower to give to a loved one, rather than purchasing a bouquet in the store? How often do you home-cook meals with loved ones as a form of connection and curiosity? When did you sit and have an honest discussion that did not involve purchasing food or coffee? Convenience is not a luxury anymore; it is a necessity. And that necessity needs money. Driving a car rather than taking public transportation; getting take-out rather than cooking at home; watching TV/movies on streaming services rather than borrowing movies at the library. Convenience is a commodity sold to the general population. But what people do not understand is that emotions have become things we can sell, too. In a world dictated by money and the ticking finger of a clock, finding time to converse with others has become inconvenient. Building a community has become a luxury, since people do not “need” others to survive anymore, they just need their money and a click of a button. Busyness is celebrated, and work has become a distraction from the obvious truth: we are lonely. Now, more than ever, people have difficulty finding meaning and a sense of purpose. Everyone cares about building their professional identities, but what about their true identities? Their hobbies and interests? When did we lose our abilities to form relationships with the people around us? Why has the importance of community been downplayed? Why do you feel a sharp pain in your heart when you watch a wholesome movie, knowing you cannot have what is portrayed? When did true community and love become a dream harder to achieve than any form of wealth?
Cabin Fever
Human beings are social creatures. During COVID, everyone felt the effects of isolation, and not being able to interact with others led to feelings of depression and anxiety in many people. People began spiraling and cabin fever began to set in. But then, things opened up again, and the sun finally lay its warm rays on your face, and all was good. But was it really? Waves that form deep in the center of the ocean must crash upon the shore eventually. Teenagers and young adults found it difficult to socialize again. Nobody bothered to train their social skills since they didn’t have a need for them anymore. In isolation, there weren’t many people to interact with. The internet and social media were nothing new at that point, but our world fundamentally changed in how it used them. Online classes became more common, apps were popping up for at-home delivery. Everything was automated and convenient, more than ever. The convenience of living, minimizing your struggle to maximize your enjoyment. But in any of your conversations recently, has anyone admitted to feeling like they’re living life to the fullest? Has anyone uttered the words, “I am content; I get to cultivate myself and my relationships. I get to love my friends and my family and I feel a sense of purpose.” Maybe not those exact words, but you get what I mean. The heart-shaped hole in your chest cannot be filled with a rectangular bill, and the words you fail to speak echo in the crevices of your mind. The thought-provoking conversations you ignore, and instead, the small-talk you engage in; it will never be enough to forge a connection, a true rope tying you to others around you. It’s just easier to go home and scroll on the couch, isn’t it? Getting a window into other people’s lives allows you to live vicariously, and the feelings of loneliness and disconnect may be subdued temporarily. People idolize celebrities and social media “influencers,” finding comfort in forming parasocial relationships that motivate you to purchase more merchandise. You may not realize this yet, but every system in this society has been developed to force you to buy more. But you will have to face it eventually. When you go home at night, it’s just you in the mirror; not the celebrities you idolize, not the money in your pocket and not the profession you work in; it’s just you. And it’s scary to think that after decades of living, some people may not really know who they are. They never challenged themselves to find out. They never bothered to converse with others around them to find out what they stand for. They never bothered trying new activities and cultivating their personality through the shared experiences they have with others. The real world is out there, daunting yet kinder than you may think.
It’s easy, right?
This is the fact that people struggle to understand: we are all connected to each other in every aspect of our lives much more than we may admit, and much more than we can know. The coffee you buy was sourced in a country on the other side of the planet, and the clothes you wear were made by a person with thoughts, feelings and dreams, just like you. I interact with many different people on a daily basis, as many of us do. And I noticed a striking trend. People will do what they like, what benefits them, forgetting the hands that helped them on their way. I noticed we live in a selfish world where it is easy to turn a blind eye rather than help a neighbour. I noticed that even the people that walk around flaunting their kindness, and checking up on others only wore a mask of affection to remove the guilt of indifference from their conscience. I learned that people care more about achieving their goals of wealth, rather than setting goals to find family and belonging. And it’s easy to ridicule them and sit on our morally high horses, rather than understand that they are a product of their environments. We are a product of our environments. And if we don’t stop to understand this fact, we cannot understand our environment and how we can change it. How every step we take means something, not just to us but to the world around us. We live on a sphere in the vacuum of space, and while we can dismiss others and think “this is not my problem,” whether you like it or not, you are a part of this community just as much as everyone is. If your door remains closed, no one will come knocking anymore. In the reflection of that mirror, it’s just you, but you are a mosaic of everyone you have interacted with. And once you realize that, you may know who you truly are.
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