Review Based on the Trailer: Waterloo Management Engineering

Note: This article is hosted here for archival purposes only. It does not necessarily represent the values of the Iron Warrior or Waterloo Engineering Society in the present day.

Sometimes I wonder if I chose the right engineering discipline. Luckily thanks to this wonderful little site known as YouTube, I can now get a taste of what all those other engineers are doing in their programs. After watching the latest video posted on the Waterloo YouTube Channel, I’ve now realized all the fun I am missing out on by not being in Management Engineering. The floating box told me that a strong engineering background could be obtained through organizational behaviour, a keystone lost on me early on in my school career here. Sure I watched the first half of the video with no sound (sorry but my sound card is so advanced, it chooses to eliminate all stock music from the early 90’s), but I’ve learned a few very interesting facts about ManEng. If you take Management Engineering you’ll get to enjoy:

-Chess matches

-Maps of South America


-Shapes no more complex than squares, no less complex than triangles.

-The Waterloo buildings in perpetual nuclear winter.

-A lack of sore throat lozenges

If this seems like hard work to you, don’t worry. Management engineering offers some sweet flatscreen computer monitors, the means to control the production of the world’s cheese, and video cameras so precise that their minimum zoom won’t even cover an entire face. And if you do really well in your class, the associate professor will hang up your finger painting in his own office for all your peers to see and be jealous.

I can safely say that after watching this video, I was incredibly primed to switch over to the management side. But then I realized the deep, dark side of this video. Related videos linking to whale depression, the fact that Lisa was playing chess with no one, the cryptic message on a whiteboard. Large square turns into a small triangle which turns into large square that turns into a big triangle? Typing that last sentence into Google and looking at the first book that shows up, we see the big problem here. Waterloo Management Engineering is actually kidnapping depressed sea animals, dressing them up as students in order to keep them in sweatshop-like conditions in order for them to sell designer quilts in order to cover the cost for new engineering buildings! Look at the signs, people! Management engineering began at the exact same time as construction for the new buildings started. No one has ever seen a Management student working on a project. And there is a shocking lack of any large freshwater sea mammals anywhere in Ontario. We’re through the looking glass now people, the real question is; will you stand idly while you know that the exploitation of cheap porpoise labour is all around you? I surely will not stand for this.

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