Humour

Distraction Newsletter Vol. II

Photo credit to Jessica Ehlers

Edited Stanley
Edited seagull
Edited caribou

The Funny Bits

The Adventures of Bob the Ghost Vol. II: Work from Home

Adventures of Boo Vol I

Crossword

Theme: Lord of the Rings

Across
2: Elvish food used for sustenance during the journey to Mount Doom
10: The measure of an economy adopted by the United States in 1991
13: Not chemically reactive
14: Lowest card in cribbage
15: Metric used in economics to estimate the profitability of potential investments.
16: Need for Speed:_____, released in 2009
17: Mythological Greek hunter and constellation
19: Small village in Kent, England where they found 34 roman coins in 1957
21: Acronym for airspeed indicator in planes
22: Acronym for one of Waterloos engineering programs
23: Ensemble of clothing worn together
26: A.K.A The Blue Mountains
28: Commonly known as Ringwraith
31: A tract of open ground, especially grassland
32: File extension for a dBASE file
34: Acronym for American automobile association
35: Elvish word for friend
39: A beverage, formerly made by boiling ale with spice, sugar, and sops of bread.
42: Word famously known to have no rhyme
43: Acronym for pop band known for the song “Tonight Tonight”
44: Acronym. Another name for the Republican Party of the United States America.
45: A.K.A Strider
49: Title given to the male head of a monastery in various western religions
52: A glowing fragment, usually coal which is found in a fire
54: Beverage that was thrown into the Boston harbor in 1773
55: An international moral and spiritual movement founded in 1938, and renamed to Initiatives of Change in 2001.
56: A posture adopted in performing hatha yoga.
57: “What, you ___! … Young fry of treachery!” (Macbeth)
58: Orc strong hold where Frodo was captured after dealing with Shelob
Down
1: Abstinence from food
2: A shoemakers thread (Scottish)
3: Irish name which means colonel
4: Video game series whos main character is Samus Aran
5: Noise you make when you’re cold
6: Acronym for the principal revenue collection body for the Australian Government
7: Acronym for the use of software and computer systems’ architectural principles to integrate a set of enterprise computer applications.
8: Name of Arts faculty helpdesk at UW
9: A wild animal’s lair or habitation
10: A castrated male cat
11: Acronym for a systematic approach to identifying, assessing and reducing the risks of disaster
12: Existing, occurring, or done in the time preceding a meal
18: Ostentatious or pretentious display.
20: Acronym for a genetic condition that affects the muscles, leading to muscle wasting that gets worse over time
21: Acronym for the Assembly of First Nations
24: Opposite of To bag
25: Material used to make pottery
26: Tickle me ____ (children’s toy)
27: Mad, frenzied or crazed in Scottish\Irish English
29: A wire, cord, or apparatus used to strangle someone
30: Acronym for the United Arab Republic
33: A shabby and unpleasant person or thing.
36: A graphic mark, emblem, or symbol used to aid and promote public identification and recognition
37: A salt or ester of orotic acid.
38: A brief period of sleep
40: A.K.A Himalayan blue sheep
41: Abbreviation of electrocardiogram
46: “The biggest little city in the world”
47: Abbreviation of regulation
48: To irritate by constant scolding or urging
49: Cable channel known for its show the Walking Dead
50: Another name for the project known as the “new silk road”
51: A counter across which alcoholic drinks or refreshments are served
52: “___ de parfum”
53: Acronym for the Microsoft Network

Answers to RuPaul Crossword in Distractions Issue Vol. I

Check it out at Distractions Issue Vol. I

Horoscopes

Gemini: May 21 – June 20

Since you’re taking classes from home this term, you’ll come to realize that you could really spruce up your workspace. Maybe your walls are too boring, maybe you need to add some posters! Whatever it is, you’ll finally find some time to put your artistic skills to work!

Cancer: June 21 – July 22

While taking a well earned study break and watching your favourite Netflix show, you’ll notice that it’s actually the nicest day out. Suddenly, you’ll realize that you miss all those recesses you spent outside with your friends in elementary school, back when playing grounders on the playground was the greatest game of all time. Ah, those were the good old days.

Leo: July 23 – August 22

It’s been a long day. You submitted a lab, did really well on two quizzes, and finally figured out a way forward with your design project. You deserve to treat yourself to a can of coca cola and a bowl of your favorite chips. You earned it! Oh, and don’t worry about the four assignments that are due tomorrow at midnight. That’s something that you can deal with tomorrow.

Virgo: August 23 – September 22

You know what you should do? You should start a blog! It’s such a great way to document all of the fun projects you’ve been doing while stuck at home. Here, I’ll even get you started on your first post: “How I Found Joy from Balancing a Rubik’s Cube on an Edge”. I mean, it’s that or writing about the 8-bit breadboard computer you spent a month creating. Up to you, though (although I’d go with the Rubik’s Cube)!

Libra: September 23 – October 22

Now that it’s summer and you have a lot of time on your hands, take up a fun hobby. Why don’t you try baking? Don’t tell me you haven’t wanted to try becoming a contestant on Cake Wars! This is your chance! You’ll start out with easy chocolate chip cookies, and before you know it, you’ll be able to make lemon meringue pie with your eyes closed! Just be sure not to burn yourself like you did with those cupcakes you tried baking two weeks ago.

Scorpio: October 23 – November 21

You’re getting tired of typing on your keyboard. It just isn’t fun anymore, and playing TypeRacer isn’t helping. You’ll finally decide that you’ve had it with typing on a boring, clackety old keyboard, and decide to purchase a rainbow LED backlit gaming keyboard from Amazon. Believe me, writing lab reports will end up being more fun than you thought!

Sagittarius: November 22 – December 21

Have you been spending too much time on your phone on weekdays? Sure, nobody’s going to catch you procrastinating, but you know deep in your heart that it’s wrong. Use this opportunity to put those electronics away and focus on what you need to get done! If you end up finding it difficult, try a focus app! There are plenty out there! If you do this, you’ll find yourself being much more productive this term, and who knows, maybe you may even finish the stack of books that have been sitting on your shelf for the last three months!

Capricorn: December 22 – January 19

Tough decisions are coming your way this month. Decisions like “Should I try cooking dinner tonight or should I just heat up some frozen pizza,” and “Should I finish that calc assignment now and not have to worry about it next week or watch the eighth season of Friends?” Choose wisely, young Padawan.

Aquarius: January 20 – February 18

Your desk is starting to get a bit cluttered. Is it the notebooks? Is it the plates and bowls you didn’t want to wash? Is it the paper airplanes you made when you were bored the other day? Whatever it is, you’ll decide to tidy up a bit and organize your desk. You’ll sort out the mess and, once you’ve finished, you’ll feel a wonderful sense of accomplishment knowing you’ve finally got things under control.

Pisces: February 19 – March 20

You’ve become a master of waking up five minutes before a BONGO meeting with your class on LEARN. Who needs time to get ready and walk to class when it’s literally four feet away from your bed? Despite this, you should consider adopting a good morning routine so that you’re not logging into your computer while you’re brushing your teeth. Wake up early, make some tea, have an omelette! It’s way better than dry cereal and a chocolate bar.

Aries: March 21 – April 19

You’re the type of person who doesn’t enjoy being stuck at home. The last thing you want is the prospect of not being able to go out with your friends or travel. You love adventures and don’t like being cooped up. Don’t worry though, there is a workaround! Try setting up a virtual video party with your friends! It’s a great way to keep in touch while being far away, and you’ll find it’s the perfect way to unwind after a long week of classes!

Taurus: April 20 – May 20

Because you live in a time zone that’s three hours behind EDT, those 8AM tutorials just aren’t going to happen for you. However, even if you can’t make them live, each one is recorded for you to go back and watch, which is definitely relieving. The only hiccup arises when the virtual meet accidentally doesn’t get recorded. At that point, the textbook and YouTube are your best friends. Gotta love technology sometimes.

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Photo by rawpixel_free from Vecteezy

“Escape Room” Puzzle

Solve these clues to obtain a three digit code. Enter http://iwarrior.uwaterloo.ca/pdf/XXX.pdf to see if you’ve solved the puzzle.

1) Riddle

Darla loves dogs and cats. She has 3 dogs and 3 cats. No pet is the same age and the ages of the pets are 1 year, 2 years, 3, years, 4 years, 5 years, and 6 years. She knows their ages and some facts about them, but she can never seem to remember their names. Using the following clues, determine the ordinal ages of the cats and dogs and determine which are cats and which are dogs.

Chad is the oldest out of the dogs. Alexandria is 2 years younger than Darla Junior.

2) Unscramble the clue

THE MEBURN FO SERTELT NI HET EANM FO TLSED TAC SI TEH OSICNIONEROSPRDG WDORO NI HET ROORWCDSS

3) Find the key

The answer to 2 will give a clue to how to use the key. Using the key which can be found on our Instagram and Facebook, you’ll be able to find the code.

Sudoku

Notes

Contributors

Editor – Ratan Varghese

Writers – Kirsten Ehlers, Akanksha Joshi, Rabiya Majeed, Jessica Ehlers

Questions and Recommendations

We want to hear from you! What do you want to see?

@theironwarrior_uw

The Iron Warrior

@TheIronWarrior

theironwarrior@gmail.com

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