Tin Soldier

Canada Post and Marijuana Peddlers Strike in Solidarity

Since October 22nd, Canada Post workers have been on rotating strikes throughout Canada. According to Canada Post, the strikes, “have touched virtually every Canada Post facility and every Canadian address so far.” This has led to an estimated 30-day backlog, which means letters and packages will face long delays.

Unfortunately for marijuana users, this also means that any weed purchased online will arrive late. The Distraught Union of Marijuana Peddlers (DUMP) has stepped in to tide the demand during this difficult time. They have chosen to stand in solidarity with Canada Post workers as negotiations continue.

“We are ready to help and we fully support the postal union’s decision to fight against the bureaucracy, man!” said Lil’ Dippy, the head of DUMP, at a press conference in an alleyway.

“Don’t be alarmed if your package is late, folks! If you need to get your fix, come find us at the corner of 4th and Janson. Nobody else gives you the high you need at rock bottom prices! Make sure you aren’t tailed by the po po though! They mustn’t find out where we operate.”

Despite the organization’s occasional run-ins with the law, DUMP has reported a surge in sales of nearly 90% since the start of the postal strike, and Wall Street investors predict that number to only get higher and higher in the coming weeks.

It may be a tumultuous time for the Canadian postal industry, but the weed industry will continue to be just fine, thanks to the hard work and dedication of young men like Lil’ Dippy in alleyways across the nation.

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