Tin Soldier

RIM Changes its Name to Blackberry

Note: This article is hosted here for archival purposes only. It does not necessarily represent the values of the Iron Warrior or Waterloo Engineering Society in the present day.

On January 30, 2013, Research in Motion announced that it will now operate by name of Blackberry. Of course, this brought a great deal of confusion to many University of Waterloo students who desperately wanted RIM jobs in between their study terms. When asking these students about why they wanted RIM jobs so badly, many of them said that it was because of the memorable hands-on experience that the upper years brag about. Some of the students went even further by saying that they like the way the products from the company feel in their hands and would like RIM jobs to help progress the stroking ability of the new touch screens. Fortunately, most of these students have settled down. By understanding why the change was made, and now hope to POP Blackberries over the four months. Just as an aside, POP stands for Professionally Optimized Personal so get your head out of the gutter. But in all seriousness, once you go black you never go back, as it appears to be the general feeling for most University of Waterloo students who have worked at Blackberry.

The company is also hoping that combining the name change with their feud against Apple will bring a new group of buyers into the market. Some have started calling it “The Battle of the Fruits,” and Blackberry is hoping that this will help get them the attention of technology haters, animal lovers, and even vegans, so that Blackberry can once again dominate one area of the market. In fact, “The Battle of the Fruits” has become so intense in the technological world that, Google is hoping its Key Lime Pie will help give them upper hand as they enter the new year. However, some may say that this is cheating because, unlike Blackberry and Apple, Google prefers to keep its external qualities the same (such as its name) while changing the internal interaction to remain relevant within the group (use of lime).

In addition, Blackberry is hoping that the name change will help settle the confusion of whether or not the company is a telecommunication developer or one of the largest, rim specialized, car garages in Canada. The company reported a record amount of soccer moms that entered the property in hopes of getting spinners installed on their mini-vans last year. When asking the local mothers at a nearby soccer field about why this is happening, they expressed that their confusion was due to the many buildings with empty parking lots. They thought it was a special garage where you leave your car outside until it’s ready for its new rims.

Only the future knows about whether or not changing the name from RIM to Blackberry makes any significant improvement to the company, but until then one question that needs to be answered is, “is the Blackberry symbol supposed to look like a blackberry?”

Leave a Reply