Letter to the Editor: An Ode to the Unpublished Article

Once upon a time, at the beginning of the term, an article was crafted which was pure of heart and glowing with untainted intentions. This lovely article was put together to educate the masses on the evils which linger in the deepest darkest corners of our small kingdom of learning. Though this enlightened kingdom fosters denizen pursuits of greater knowledge and exploration, it also plays host to a darker type of citizen. Composed mainly of evil, these dishonourable citizens skulk around about both in the dark and in the light of day, taking illegal possession of the transportation so dear and beloved to its naive, youthful owners, the pure-hearted and honest citizens of the great Kingdom. Alas, not a word of warning was being disseminated among the masses. No cautionary tales of ineffective bike chains or the theft of the very wheels of these oh-so-important transportation devices.

Luckily, a good citizen was there for their less distrusting peers. Word would get out about the evils lurking about! Cautionary tales and useful advice like the fact that they must use proper U-locks in place of a chain. No rest for the wicked so no rest for the good. Alas, yet again, disaster struck. The pure little article was not permitted in the paper! Ignorant of the terror this evil could wreck, the editor and her minions did not see the need and so refused to set the seed of doubt in the minds of their innocent readers.  With sadness, the good-hearted citizen watched in hopeless despair as friend after friend fell victim to the evils lurking out there.

But, perhaps, it was not too late, time remained, people could still be saved! Week after week, the good-hearted citizen continued to try; they did not want the hopes and the dreams of others to die. An article in October couldn’t go wrong, the evils were still out there, still time for bike owners to pay head to the cautionary song. Compassion, the good citizen found, was quick to run dry. As days and weeks continued to pass by, the citizen increasingly sighed.

As December 21^st approaches, it brings with it the threat of the end of the world. “You can’t run, nor can you hide the believers” are heard to cry. The good citizen demanded, “How does this make you feel?” Destruction approaches, it has many forms, a solar flare, earthquake, tsunami, and more. The possible terrors just make you want to run out the door. How must they feel, our Editor and Co. For now, with possibly only 24 possible days remaining, they must know the mental pain inflicted on the good citizens of the Kingdom of Learning. Through their purposeful omission, they must know that in the limited time left to us, they could have saved others the undue stress and betrayal.
Then one day, not so long ago, the good citizen suffered the ultimate betrayal. Though guilty they were, through omission alone the citizen had thought. But their actions were not so innocent, she found. That fateful day she noticed money being exchanged in a back alley, the Editor and the evil bike thieves were working together, one hand rubbing the other! The end of the world had actually come!