The engineering society has spoken: the number one requirement to be a B-Soc executive is height (or lack thereof), with incoming exec a cumulative 10 inches shorter than the outgoing team.
Voters opted for a shorter exec-“I just like being able to look down on them”, said one anonymous voter.
“All in all, we are just too damn tall,” stated outgoing President Scott Rankin. “It’s clear the people have spoken-I’ve been in tears reading the mountains of feedback criticizing my height” added outgoing VP Finance, Jon Warren.
Owen Coutts, shortest of the new exec at 4’11” (see picture), claimed “We have known for years that us short people are superior leaders: now we will finally get a chance to prove it.” Rumours of a little conspiracy are unconfirmed, but under ongoing investigation.
Leave a Reply