Humour

VP in charge of stuff to do with academics, sometimes Report

Note: This article is hosted here for archival purposes only. It does not necessarily represent the values of the Iron Warrior or Waterloo Engineering Society in the present day.

Hey A-Soc,

So the end of the term is here and a lot of things happened this term. First of all the UW bike Race hosted by EngSoc was a great success, the turnout was super and $5000 in prizes were handed out – students from all disciplines and classes came out to race like crazy especially those Europeans who usually don’t come to EngSoc events. But just when you thought it was all over – it is not – an innovative bike race “Bikerloo” is happening for the first time next weekend. That is two weekends of biking in a row! Being the first of its kind “Bikerloo” is expected to draw upon a variety of students. Also Waterloo “Dot Dot Dot Dash Dash Dash Dot Dot Dot” is well underway and has been experiencing a growth in demand so I would encourage everyone here to volunteer, help cover every campus bulletin board with posters and get students to learn how to take an integral. Finally, the new innovative project Blow It Up has experienced a more than average number of visits to the website. While currently it is only meant to help first year chemical engineering students, I would like everyone in engineering to take a look and get involved with the project as much as they can. Oh, almost forgot – we also had a great motivational guest speaker this term who tried to motivate students to come out to motivational speakers. Perhaps next term we should line up a guest speaker to motivate us to reply to every single email we get in under a year. Some of the potential strategies would involve putting in your signature line that if you replied to this email in over 24hours you owe the recipient a new laptop and how to claim it.

This term has been rather uneventful in terms of academic decisions and there isn’t a whole lot to talk about when it comes to things like co-op, school policies and exam bank. It is worth mentioning that the PDEng Task Force website is http://www.engineering.uwaterloo.ca/pdengrenewal and we should probably see if there is anything new there but I wouldn’t worry about it too much.

Finally, I would like to share some secrets with my successor on how to be a very efficient VP-……….“something about Academics. I forget”. This is a very valuable piece of information. Once you become the VP of the UW Soup Marketing Committee, the UW Breakfast Club as well as the President of the new MIR Blueberry Promotional Task Force and the team captain of the varsity jump rope team you will find this very helpful.  Oh yes, and do not forget to take 7 classes so that it looks like you care about academic stuff.  First you must work on delegating as many tasks as possible to others around you.  Then you have to try to ignore the massive amount of emails piling up in your mailbox. Also you should try to multitask and get all your critical work done while looking like you are doing something else and use meeting times to check your Facebook and watch as your unread email count continues to break the record for the number of unread emails. Finally, it is key to show up fashionably late to a number of things such as meetings with the Dean – who knows how you can save 15 minutes here and there.

That is all I have for now. I hope that my replacement will be able to keep up with my fashion sense.  I have left some butterfly wings and semi formal t-shirts in the transition material and hope they can live up to my legacy.

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