A&E

The Fashion Files – Laws of Fashion

Note: This article is hosted here for archival purposes only. It does not necessarily represent the values of the Iron Warrior or Waterloo Engineering Society in the present day.

We are a population governed by laws, some more important than others. There are math laws, science laws, traffic laws, the bro code, laws of attraction and so many more which we must obey every day since failing to do so results in swift and harsh penalties.

One set of laws frequently forgotten by engineers (and mathies) in particular are the Laws of Fashion! Yes, there are such laws, and yes, there are penalties for breaking them. Penalties include loss of career opportunities, loss of friendship and loss of invitations to social events. There are also side effects to breaking the laws of fashion including having young children point and laugh, having old ladies stare sternly and having your best friend get dizzy and vomit at the sight of your law breaking outfit.

While some of you may claim ignorance to the Laws of Fashion, this article aims to educate and motivate you to raise your own personal standards of fashion. Improving your fashion will have positive effects on humankind in general, but just in case that isn’t enough motivation, I’ve added my own incentive…

From the very moment you read this issue, I will be watching you. I will see every time you break a Law of Fashion, and I will document it. I will also see outstanding displays of fashion and will take note of those also. Every two weeks in this very newspaper, I will publish the best and worst I have seen, so dress to impress! You have been warned, adhere to the following simple Laws of Fashion:

No White After Labour Day

This is without a doubt one of the most important, frequently misunderstood and unobserved Laws of Fashion so I will attempt to clarify. I frequently get the question, “Isn’t it always after labour day?” and the answer is no! The Tuesday following Labour Day until the Sunday during May Long weekend are dates during which white must not be worn. White items that must not be worn include pants, skirts, dresses, shoes (except athletic), purses, hats and jewellery. For practical purposes, it is acceptable to wear some white items including shirts, athletic/running shoes and socks.

No White Socks with Dark Pants

When walking around with your pants covering the tops of your shoes, nobody can see the broken Law of Fashion hiding around your ankles; it’s your dirty little secret. Then you sit down and those bright white socks cause visual trauma to anybody to see them shine against the black shoes and dress pants you’ve worn to your co-op interview. White socks should be avoided when wearing any dark pant including medium to dark wash jeans. Considering the undergraduate population wears jeans or khakis to class nearly every day and on weekends, the majority of your sock drawer should be composed of navy, black and brown socks. Try to reserve white socks for where they belong, either with light wash jeans, white pants (which you should own by the way) or in your gym bag.

Wear White during the Summer!

So I’ve told you when not to wear white, but that just makes white more special for the 4 months it is socially acceptable to wear! During the summer months, particularly this summer, go all out and wear entire white outfits. We all have white t-shirts and knits, but those aren’t special summer white pieces. Try adding a white item you wouldn’t typically wear to your wardrobe this summer. For most people, that means a pant, capri, short, skirt or even a white sundress. You’ll be amazed at how versatile white items can be in your summer wardrobe and how quickly they turn your existing clothes into airy looking summer apparel. If you aren’t ready to commit to new clothing and want to economize, try adding white accessories. White sunglasses are always fun as is a white watch or belt. For the ladies in particular, white accessories including necklaces, earring, bracelets and hair pieces  can be a great low cost way of making your wardrobe more summery; try H&M for some economical and awesome looking finds!
Hint: To add an extra bit of luxury to your white outfit, try adding gold to the mix with your white accessories; you’ll be amazed at the designer look you can pull off for a fraction of the price!

Stay Classy,
Amanda
Chief-Fashion-Officer (CFO)

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