Humour

Sausage, Breadcrumbs, and a World of Imagination

Note: This article is hosted here for archival purposes only. It does not necessarily represent the values of the Iron Warrior or Waterloo Engineering Society in the present day.

Hello aspiring chefs,

Last issue, we went through how to make a delicious potato salad. Today, I have the second half of that meal: the main course. This time, I show you how to make a delicious dish with little more than some sausage and breadcrumbs.

And don’t forget the rules:

1. If it’s not in your pantry, you don’t need it.

2. Cooking with a measuring cup is like using calipers to construct a treehouse

3. If it doesn’t taste good, you can fix it—guaranteed.

On to the recipe; this is one which I made with some severe ingredient constraints: I had sausage which was in imminent danger of spoiling, and a bag of panko that my parents had bought me – If you are unfamiliar with panko, it is a Japanese-style breadcrumb, and could easily be replaced by normal breadcrumbs or crushed potato chips – So I came into the kitchen with no idea what I was making, but that it would involve panko and sausage meat.

Step one: I turned on the oven and set the temperature to 425°F – My default temperature is 400°F, and I adjust it up or down depending on how quickly I want it done and how big the meal is: larger meals require lower temperature since you need the inside to heat up before the outside burns. I still didn’t know what I was making, but I knew that it would involve the oven since I didn’t have time to nurse the sausages in a pan. After assembling my ingredients, my mind immediately went to Pogos, the pre-made batter-covered hot-dog treat I used to love as a child. Reasoning that sausages were like hot dogs, and that panko and flour-batter were both made mostly of starch, I decided that I could make my own Pogos.

Step two: I poured some panko into a bowl, and rolled a sausage in it. The panko initially didn’t stick but remembering that most batter have eggs, I whipped up an egg in a second bowl and tried dunking my sausage in the egg before the panko. This worked well, especially when I did it twice, going egg-panko-egg-panko-tray. After the first set of these, I noticed that I was going to have a bunch of egg batter left over after the sausages were all coated, so I perforated the remaining sausages with a fork such that some of the egg would sneak in under their casings. Once all the sausages were coated, I emptied what was left of the egg into the sausage tray, followed by the remaining panko.

Step three: As my sausages cooked away merrily in the oven, I turned my attention to the other parts of the meaf: I raided my refrigerator and found half of a green pepper and half a white onion. I chopped up some of both, then fried them with butter in a pan. I also chopped up some cheese and tomato.

Step four: I found some frozen olive bread from Valuemart and stuck them in the microwave. 30 seconds in, I had some delicious bread for making sausage sandwiches.

Step five: Once the sausages were cooked, I took them out of the oven. The panko had largely fallen off but had been sitting in the sausages’ juices and made for a delicious crunchy side dish. I cut the sausage length-wise and put it on the bread, heaping ketchup and all the toppings I had chopped on top.

Final verdict? Delicious.

For future,  I might try putting something like paprika in with the panko – I recommend you try it yourself.  I might also try using cooked rice instead of panko, and syrup as the sticking agent – One never knows what will end up tasting absolutely fantastic!

Happy experimenting.

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