So we were at the Kickoffice, the official headquarters of Getting Good Head, and we realized that we had to write an article. This was quite convenient, since the Kickoffice serves good beer, and we can talk about it. Joining us today is Colin “I’m Back in School” Macpherson, Matt “Rolly, Polly, and Agile” Hunt, Sean “Didn’t Win VP Graeme Scott” Walsh, Kayla “Graeme Made Me Come” Sheremeta, and Megan “I’m Still Not Drinking the Same Beer As Everyone Else” Pollock. Once again, Megan had been asked to leave, but somehow managed to thrust her way into the article.
This week, we chose to discuss Innis Ampersand Gunn Porter. We mostly chose this because it’s a cask beer, which means that Bill must pump it out of the cask every time we order one. This is the most physical labour per dollar that we can get from Bill.
It was also conveniently the beer we had when Megan pointed out that we have an article due, which was nice of her. I guess that’s why we let her in this week. Now I suppose we should start talking about the beer.
Before we get to that, we’d like to clear something up. Innis Ampersand Gunn is spelt with an ampersand. This is the symbol that looks like this: “&”. We’d like to remind our highly educated readership that ampersand is pronounced amp-er-sand, not amp-er-stand. Like, come on!
Now back to beer for reals. The main thing that’s neat about Innis Ampersand Gunn is that it’s aged in oak barrels like whisky. There’s a great story behind this: the brewery was trying to make scotch whisky with ale flavours, so they put beer in the oak casks to give them a beer taste. The beer that came out of the barrels was darn good, so they said “screw whisky, lets just make beer!” Ever since then, they’ve been making beer.
So how about the Porter that we’re drinking? It’s a lighter Porter, is very smooth and has very little carbonation. This makes for a nice smooth mouthfeel (coincidentally, mouthfeel is the best word to describe anything ever). It’s also pretty strong, at 7.4% ABV, which is always a treat. It should be noted that higher alcoholic content increases the quality of our articles.
And now a word from our sponsor: Alcohol. According to Waterloo Policy 21 (Alcohol Use and Education): “Promotion or advertising that refers to alcoholic products, brewers or distillers, is restricted to […] and in magazines or newspapers distributed on campus.” For this reason, we’d like to promote alcohol in general. After all, these articles wouldn’t be possible without the continued support of alcohol.
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And now, what has become somewhat of a tradition…QUOTE TIME!
Colin says “It’s good. It’s not like a full porter, but it’s something before that, but it’s good.”
Matt says “What is that flavour?…Because it’s not charcoal. I’m Matt! I’m Matt! I’m Matt! [He’s Matt…].”
Megan wants a quote…”I like this beer, because it tastes like wheat beer so you can drink it fast, but it doesn’t look like wheat beer so it doesn’t fill you up.” As you may have figured out, Megan isn’t drinking the same beer as us, but is instead, reviewing Weihenstephaner Kristall. She says that next week she’ll review this beer.
Sean and Kayla are playing cards and we decided not to bother them, we also hit our word count.
So, we’ve decided to give the Innis Ampersand Gunn 3.75 Surly Bartenders. On that note, you can check out Youtube to see our favourite Surly Bartender, Bill’s talk at TEDxUW on November 17. We’re not even kidding. Next time, we’ll discuss the Reverse Cowgirl.
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