Halloween is here! You may or may not be wearing a costume right now, but everybody loves candy on Halloween. Of course, Variable Recipes has a seasonable recipe at all times.
No, of course it isn’t a candy recipe. Who makes candy? You buy candy, silly. It’s like, $0.99. What else is Halloween about?
Pumpkins, that’s what!
Here is a pumpkin bread recipe. It is not as variable as most variable recipes, and that is because it is baked goods. If you mess around with baked goods too much, they will be completely ruined. So, this week only, do as I say! If you are very good, you may get a few variables at the end. (Didn’t you have enough of them during midterms?)
Here are the things you need:
- 1 (15 ounce) can pumpkin puree
- 4 eggs
- 1 cup vegetable oil
- 2/3 cup water
- 3 cups white sugar
- 3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
- 2 teaspoons baking soda
- 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
Yes, a list. Get over it.
Here are the things you want:
Ground (cinnamon + cloves + nutmeg + ginger). Don’t add more than half a spoonful of cloves.
Mix together the pumpkin puree, eggs, oil, water, and sugar. Mix them good.
Now, mix the rest of the ingredients in a different bowl. When you have two mixtures, mix the mixtures together. Don’t stir violently – just fold them in together gently (No, I don’t know why it’s so convoluted. Just do as I say! If you don’t, your bread will be as hard as a rock).
Now comes the fun part! If you have anything you want to add in to your bread, now is the time. You can put in the good old staples (chocolate chips, nuts, and raisins), or you can do something very scary indeed. Put in gummy worms or ladies’ fingers (the cookies, you freak). Fold these extra ingredients in very gently, and for heaven’s sake make sure that the mass of the batter is greater than the mass of the solutes (the added goodies).
Midterms have had a detrimental effect on Iron Warrior staff –Ed..
Put the batter in greased and floured loaf pans. (That means you sprinkle flour on the pans after you grease them, you ninny.) Bake them at 350 degrees for about 50 minutes, or until a skewer poked in the top comes out clean.
Let cool and enjoy!
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