I love watching the Republican debates. I love watching them because it’s relevant to Canada’s future on a subtle level that most of us would rather deny. But more importantly, I love watching them for its entertainment value. They’re entertaining because postulating the notion that one of those candidates could potentially become the next President of the United States is a terrifying thought (you see, I am sadist who is entertained by terrible and frightful thoughts).
Going along with that notion, the award for the most “entertaining” candidate of this week’s debate goes unequivocally to Rick Perry. For those of you unfamiliar of the reference I’m making, take a minute to visit Youtube, type “Rick Perry” into the search bar, and click on the first non-featured video. That’s right, it has officially gone viral.
It would be rather futile for me to describe the content of the video with mere words, for I have not yet mastered the linguistic diction to convey the raw emotions one would feel from experiencing the visceral train-wreck first hand. So instead, I’ll just leave the transcript right here:
Rick Perry: …and I will tell you, it’s three agencies the government when I get there, that are gone. Commerce, Education and ahh, what’s the third one there, let’s see…
Ron Paul: You need five.
Rick Perry: Oh five. Okay.
Ron Paul: Five.
Rick Perry: Commerce, Education, and ah, the, umm…
Rick Santorum: EPA (Environmental Protection Agency).
Rick Perry: EPA, there you go (chuckling) — no…
Panel: Seriously, is EPA the one you were talking about sir?
Rick Perry: No, sir. No, sir. We were talking about the umm, the agencies of government, EPA needs to be rebuilt. There’s no doubt – there’s no doubt about that.
Panel: But you can’t name the third one.
Rick Perry: The third agency of government I would do away with Education, uhhhh, the uhhhh…Commerce, let’s see…
Herman Cain: Oh my.
Rick Perry: I can’t – the third one I can’t sorry. Oops.
Well, at least we can appreciate why Rick Perry wants to do away with the Department of Education.
The intermittent “uhh’s” and brief pauses in his speech may seem like seconds to us, but there is no doubt that beneath the feigned smile that an entire lifetime had gone by for Perry as he rampages through his memory, searching for the right words. To those who are wondering, the third agency that he so desperately tries to remember is the Department of Energy.
If this were the Oscars, then Ron Paul and Rick Santorum may very well deserve the award for best supporting actors for their riveting troll-foo performance. Honorable mention goes to Herman Cain, for his delivering the final coup de grâce.
Rick Perry may be merely running for president at this point, but he is the current Governor of Texas. He is also the current leading Republican candidate, ahead of Mitt Romney and Herman Cain. This is unsettling. It is unsettling not only because of the video, it is unsettling because it fills me with a sense of unease in believing that someone with a GPA of 2.5 with a degree in Animal Science could end up being the next President of The United States.
No, perhaps I’m being too narrow-minded. After all, the underlying value of the American Dream preaches equal opportunity for all, regardless of their background or upbringing. Bush’s Harvard MBA certainly did not give him the foresight to prevent the global recession in 2008, which traces its roots back to the policies of Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae.
America is an interesting country with interesting people. However, its allure is not without a dark side. Part of the social paradigm that makes America a great country in theory also lends itself to the pitfall of creating a wide social-economic divide between different social classes. The United States currently has a Gini coefficient of 0.4 (on par with Cambodia) and also one of the highest amongst developed nations (the Gini coefficient is a measure of the income inequality within the population of a country, where a low score indicates lower inequality and vice versa). Though the social-economic borders may be invisible, its effects are not. In the city of Providence, million-dollar mansions are flanked by sprawling ghettos no more than a few minutes walk away; the surreal scenery flashes before my eyes everyday as I bike down College Hill.
It is this social-inequallity issue that serves as the core subtext surrounding the recent political debates, and it is big on the list of things for the next President of the United States to tackle. Or at least pander that perception to the public. For reasons related to this, Obama’s first four years have apparently left a bad taste in people’s mouths. The same people who voted for Obama in 2008 are now part of the Occupy Movement that’s dotting across the nation. With an approval rating at an all-time low of 38%, Americans are once again intoxicated by the belief that perhaps “the grass is greener on the other side.” But is it really?
The irony is heavy on this one. Maybe Ron Paul will save us all.
Leave a Reply