Ali Elkamel:“My kids don’t want to eat when I cook. When they misbehave I threaten them, I tell them I’m going to cook today” – September 28th
*Telling students to put away their laptops“I will apply Newton’s laws on your laptop” – September 28th
*Talking about Matlab“There’s a random function I use to generate random numbers, sometimes I use it to make your grades” – September 28th
“Bush is gone, I can’t make Bush jokes anymore”
Carey Bissonnette:“You’re complicating my analysis. I’ll beat you with a stick.”
“Eat lots of turkey. If you’re a vegetarian eat lots of pumpkin or something” –October 8th
“my cat is so fat. it’s on a diet and yet it won’t lose weight. it’s like it breathes in calories. and its nice and all. but as dumb as a door nail.”Tony EndersEarth 260
Dr. Tchir (Chem 262):(While talking to a class of Chems)”My first computer at 500MB of RAM on it. Do you know how small that is? Nowadays you wouldn’t even buy a watch with only 500MB of RAM!”
“If you really wanted to go to school for football you would have gone to Laurier. What they’ve got over there is a football team with a business school attached to it.”
“After all, we don’t believe in killing second year students. If you mess up in a lab, it should mean a loss of marks, not the death penalty.”
Student: “Did you get a haircut?”Prof. Wood: “I got them all cut”Simon Wood Music 140
“Do you want to close that door at the back or should I go out into the hallway and kill them?”Simon Wood Music 140
“You may have trouble reading that because there are vowels in that sentence. You may remember those from public school”Simon WoodMusic 140
“You have probably heard Beethoven’s symphony more than he did……. I know, he was deaf”Simon WoodMusic 140
“In 2009, the question is stupid, but if your put a gun to my head…”Simon WoodMusic 140
Patrick Roh:Roh: “What’s the value of pi?”Undergrad: “3.141592654358579….”*continues for 30 seconds*Roh: “Wow, people who play world of warcraft are cooler than that.”
Balogh:*talking about rotational motion*“I have two balls, one with mass 100g, the other with mass 250g. Now I have a rod with mass of 500g in-between.”
Dr. Henneke:“The president doesn’t sell drugs”“I’ve lived a very colourful life. I don’t recommend doing what i did”
Harmsworth:“If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and talks like a duck, it’s a duck”“thou shalt not divide by zero”
Carey Bissonnette:“If I see stuff like this, my kind coefficient becomes very small”
Kela Weber”I’m running out of time here, so I’m just going to finish up orally”ENVE 276
Prof Quotes
Note: This article is hosted here for archival purposes only. It does not necessarily represent the values of the Iron Warrior or Waterloo Engineering Society in the present day.
Ali Elkamel:
“My kids don’t want to eat when I cook. When they misbehave I threaten them, I tell them I’m going to cook today” – September 28th
*Telling students to put away their laptops
“I will apply Newton’s laws on your laptop” – September 28th
*Talking about Matlab
“There’s a random function I use to generate random numbers, sometimes I use it to make your grades” – September 28th
“Bush is gone, I can’t make Bush jokes anymore”
Carey Bissonnette:
“You’re complicating my analysis. I’ll beat you with a stick.”
“Eat lots of turkey. If you’re a vegetarian eat lots of pumpkin or something” –October 8th
“my cat is so fat. it’s on a diet and yet it won’t lose weight. it’s like it breathes in calories. and its nice and all. but as dumb as a door nail.”
Tony Enders
Earth 260
Dr. Tchir (Chem 262):
(While talking to a class of Chems)
“My first computer at 500MB of RAM on it. Do you know how small that is? Nowadays you wouldn’t even buy a watch with only 500MB of RAM!”
“If you really wanted to go to school for football you would have gone to Laurier. What they’ve got over there is a football team with a business school attached to it.”
“After all, we don’t believe in killing second year students. If you mess up in a lab, it should mean a loss of marks, not the death penalty.”
Student: “Did you get a haircut?”
Prof. Wood: “I got them all cut”
Simon Wood
Music 140
“Do you want to close that door at the back or should I go out into the hallway and kill them?”
Simon Wood
Music 140
“You may have trouble reading that because there are vowels in that sentence. You may remember those from public school”
Simon Wood
Music 140
“You have probably heard Beethoven’s symphony more than he did……. I know, he was deaf”
Simon Wood
Music 140
“In 2009, the question is stupid, but if your put a gun to my head…”
Simon Wood
Music 140
Patrick Roh:
Roh: “What’s the value of pi?”
Undergrad: “3.141592654358579….”*continues for 30 seconds*
Roh: “Wow, people who play world of warcraft are cooler than that.”
Balogh:
*talking about rotational motion*
“I have two balls, one with mass 100g, the other with mass 250g. Now I have a rod with mass of 500g in-between.”
Dr. Henneke:
“The president doesn’t sell drugs”
“I’ve lived a very colourful life. I don’t recommend doing what i did”
Harmsworth:
“If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and talks like a duck, it’s a duck”
“thou shalt not divide by zero”
Carey Bissonnette:
“If I see stuff like this, my kind coefficient becomes very small”
Kela Weber
“I’m running out of time here, so I’m just going to finish up orally”
ENVE 276
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