WANTED: New Waterloo Mascot to Replace Condom-themed Branding

uhh - pun
Posted on: July 18, 2018

*** The Tin Soldier is intended to be a humorous and entertaining look at issues and events at the University of Waterloo. As such articles should not be taken to represent real events or opinions, and they should not be associated with the University of Waterloo staff or administration in any way. Any similarities to real world events, people or corporations is purely coincidental – or non-coincidental but meant in an entirely joking manner.***

Dear students,

It has recently come to the attention of the university that there exists a condom brand, Trojan Condoms, which displays similar vital characteristics to the Waterloo Warrior.

Although our mighty warrior is always safe, the University feels the image association with a contraceptive brand is less than ideal. It has also contacted the brand and learned that unfortunately the Trojan company has been around 40 years longer than the University. Any attempt to influence them to rebrand has hit rubber wall after wall.

The University is particularly displeased to have to choose a new mascot when the Warrior seemed a perfect fit after the last …difficulty. Our original mascot the Waterloo Mule was beloved by very few.

The Mules were meant to be comparable to Western’s Mustangs but somehow we never got the respect that the Mighty Mule deserves. What’s more respectable than a Warrior we asked ourselves? Well apparently, Waterloo is once again the butt of the joke!

No more I said. And so, it is with great pleasure that I announce to you Waterloo’s new mascot, a nod to the University’s constant presence at the forefront of Innovation and Ideas. Please welcome the Waterloo Emojis. A different emoji for every team. Truly unique, Waterloo is once more Beyond Ideas.

There are no comments yet, add one below.

Leave a Comment