Scientists Resign as Minecraft Proves Flat Earth Theories

Steve the Default - 1B Cubical Engineering
Posted on: March 25, 2018

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In a 98-page study released by the University of Notchingham, researchers at the university provided conclusive proof of a flat earth after reaching the end of a Minecraft world. The research was adapted from an old paper, which was able to postulate the possibility based on Runescape players. However the research was never furthered as the author sadly passed in wildy level 1. What a noob. Professor Creeper, the sole author of the recent paper, ended up receiving a Nobel Peace Prize for settling the decade old debate. Conflicts around the globe between flat-earth truthers and round-earth shillers have been appeased at the result of this new information.

We got in touch with a few scientists to hear their testimonials about this new information. Dr. Ender, a well known theoretical spherist responded, “well it’s irrefutable. Might as well toss my research aside and mine some diamonds.” Dr. Prince, a conspiracy theorist responded, “Screw this. I’m still going to follow the Katamari theory of round earth.”

Minecraft players on the other hand rejoiced after their theories had finally been proven. Statues were erected in the honour of Dr. Creeper’s discovery, but were taken down due to “phallic interpretations” by the city councils. Youtubers found themselves collecting more ad revenue while LittleBigPlanet players saw drops in sackboy populations after players converted religions.

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