Humour

Sex-Ed Curriculum Changes Stir Nonsense (As Expected)

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Ontario Education Minister Liz Sandals recently introduced changes to the sex-ed curriculum, which had not been updated since 1998. Ms. Sandals sates the goal of the changes is to make sure elementary school students living in a digital world are aware of what goes on online, and most importantly that they have “the right information.”

These changes have allegedly been a priority since former sitting duck (quack!) / “Education Walk the Walk, but not Talk the Talk” Premier Dalton McGinty caved to religious and homo/trans-phobic, and yes (would you believe it?!) anti-abortion extremist groups. This time Ms. Sandals is putting her foot on the gas, as Ontario teachers will be well versed in the new curriculum in time for the Fall 2015 school year.

Here’s a quick rundown of the most controversial changes: Students will be introduced to the concept of sexual orientation in grade 3, learn about homophobia and other forms of discrimination and how to handle them in grade 6, as well as more material on gender identity in grade 8. Students in grades 4-6 will learn about the dangers of posting sexual images and information online. In grade 7, “sexting” will be discussed in detail. (Source: The Globe and Mail).

In an attempt to avoid the nonsense that inevitably ensued, public-relations efforts were made prior to introduction of the curriculum. Despite this, the extremist groups are at it again, using like-minded political figures as ammunition.

Several organizations including the Institute for Canadian Values (if the name doesn’t sketch you out, Ching doesn’t know what does), the Campaign Life Coalition (a pro-life, anti-abortion group) and other religious groups are taking to Queen’s Park to protest the curriculum change. Among them are two politicians, including London MPP Monte McNaughton, who was quoted saying, “This government is disrespecting parents.” Of course, Mr. McNaughton refrained from pointing out what exactly was “wrong” with the curriculum.

Well, Mr. McNaughton and company, Ching has a little reverse Ching-ology for you:

It is all well and good that you think the new curriculum is disrespecting parents, but you tell me, do you watch your child like a hawk all day? Is that all you have time to do? How do you know your children aren’t on porn sites? How do you know their friends aren’t on porn sites? Just because you can afford to send your kids to some preppy private school where you pay for your children’s marks doesn’t guarantee anything. It’s so easy for kids these days. Your kids probably have smartphones too. Porn on the go! Tinder! Dating apps for all ages! Boo YAH! Maybe you should check your child’s browsing history… oops they probably know how to clear it and/or you don’t know how to check that!

And then there’s that one day when you awkwardly and inevitably find out. Would you enjoy that?

Oh that’s not the problem you say? Can you tell us specifically what the problem is, or would that be politically incorrect, sirs and mesdames? Oh it would now, wouldn’t it? Oh, such a shame. Not to worry! Ching shall make it easier for you: You’re worried that education about homophobia, etc. will make it okay for your children to feel comfortable with being who they are. So if, on the off chance… But this must be impossible! These things just started coming around now, it’s not like we’ve had these people around for a long time or anything…your kid is gay/queer/transexual/transgender, they should learn to hide that and be insecure for the rest of their lives. You will have to disown them. It’s better to just never find out. That’s easier. It is important to always choose what’s easy—after all they are your kids so they’ll just have to understand.

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