CP: Body Scanners

Amanda LeDuc - 3A Management
Posted on: January 20, 2010

Have you heard about the latest method of ramping up of security at airports around the world? Involuntary strip searches for everybody! The best part is, you don’t even have to remove your clothes, security can see right through them. Isn’t that awesome? NOT!

In the post 9/11 world, we air travelers have learned to accept excessive security measures because they are “for our own good”. Aside from the usual metal detectors, random checks are also being adopted. In fact, each of the three times I flew out of the Calgary airport during the fall term, I was “randomly selected” to be patted down even though I didn’t beep. The third and final time it happened, I explained to the security lady that this was my third time being randomly selected and asked how they pick people. She responded, “Oh, I pick people who look friendly and won’t give me a hard time if I approach them for additional security screening”. Are you kidding me? Do you think the guy who strapped a bomb to his crotch on Christmas looked cheery going through security? I highly doubt he was happy to blow his body to bits. So, based on the criteria that Calgary Airport uses to select individuals for additional security screening, he likely wouldn’t have been selected. Instead, some friendly looking young lady (like me) was likely selected.

To fix this type of issue, everybody will soon have to pass through a body scanner which sees through your clothes, right down to your personal business. It reveals everything from implants to hidden piercings, and hopefully, bombs. At the moment, these scanners are in the testing phase at a few airports in Canada and travelers are given the option to go through normal metal detector testing, instead of stepping into the scanner. As long as scanner use remains voluntary, it’s fine. If someone prefers to skip the metal detector line-up for the shorter body scanner line up, that is their prerogative. Personally, I would rather wait in line than have some security personnel see through my clothing.

But wait, they want to make this experience as comfortable and non-awkward as possible, so the security people viewing the images are in a separate room from you altogether. You should feel much better not being able to hear the comments and lewd remarks being made by the “highly trained” security staff. They also claim that the images will not be stored in any fashion. How do we know? The security people in the other room could be copying the images onto their personal computers and selling the images on eBay and we’d never be the wiser because we can’t see them looking at us naked!

You can soon expect these scanners in airports throughout Canada including the Vancouver International Airport. But wait for it, there is one exception for who doesn’t have to walk through it in Canadian airports: people under 18 years of age. Do you want to know why? There are concerns that these images could be considered child pornography. So wait, if it’s considered child pornography when people under 18 are scanned, isn’t it normal pornography when people over 18 are scanned? So next time you fly, you get to be a porn star “for your own good”! Oh well, at least they’re protecting the young, innocent children, who, as a by-product of being protected, will now be the next terrorists to carry bombs strapped to their nether regions through airport security. It’s true – by creating this small loophole, security is giving the terrorists such an easy way through security: hire younger terrorists.

At what point will we say enough is enough? At what point will these crazy security measures deter air travel? Don’t get me wrong, I tend to fly a lot and I do appreciate security, but at some point it gets excessive.

I assume after these scanners get implemented, some sort of weapon will breach them and we’ll have to come up with a new type of security. Just about the only more extreme security measure than these scanners would be a real strip search. Ready for that? Naked flying: The future of air travel … and you thought being stuck in an economy class seat beside the overweight person beside you was bad, now you get to do it naked!

See you in the naked skies!

PS. Don’t believe anything Alex says. She’s incredibly bitter and shouldn’t be trusted. Also, she once got attacked by pirates while reading Twilight and hasn’t been the same since.